Marriage is hard. No doubt about it. But I am here to give you tips on how to have a strong marriage. I have been married for 7 years. Of course there have been ups and downs. But I think that I have learned so much over the years and can’t wait to see how much better our relationship gets. I have 10 tips that have helped my relationship that I can’t wait to share.
You Can Go to Bed Mad
I think my number one tip is that you can go to bed mad. Maybe that just works for us. But we do well to give each other some place and to spend some time alone cooling down. If we step away we don’t say things we regret in the heat of the moment. And then when we wake up, most of the time we don’t even remember what it was about and we just move on. Of course if it is something that still needs to be discussed we will but a lot of the time we just drop it and move on.
Make Realistic Expectations
I think that sometimes you think life will be perfect and it isn’t and that is okay. But we all know that life isn’t perfect so we shouldn’t expect that. Doing so will just drive us crazy! And remember there are things you do that drive your partner mad- just like how they drive you crazy haha.
Communication is Key
Your partner is not a mind reader! So be sure to effectively explain how you feel and what you are thinking. It is so important to say what you are feeling, what you are thinking etc. I think so many conflicts can be avoided if you explain what you are thinking in a calm manner. Of course this is easier said than done so try to make it a priority to communicate effectively.
Talk about the Hard Things Like Money and Kids
While you are dating it is so important to have the hard talks. I have had friend’s marriages ruined when there are things that could have been fixed from the beginning. A lot of the time they weren’t on the same page from the start. While these conversations aren’t fun to have- they are essential and can prevent a lot of fighting in the future.
Be Best Friends but Also Have Your Own Space
In thinking about how to have a strong marriage I have found that you truly do need to treat your partner like your best friend. Don’t hold things back from them! And while it is awesome to be very close and best friends- it is okay to also have your own space. Not only is it okay but it is in my opinion a must to be able to take a break from each other. I love going to bunco with my friends. My husband loves going out with his brothers. We both work hard and sometimes just need a night out. Once we come home we have new found patience with each other.
Laugh and Have Fun with Each Other
If you are looking for how to have a strong marriage then I highly suggest taking the time to laugh with each other. I love having fun with my husband. I love that we can talk about the most serious things as well as be totally goofy an hour later. Look for ways to be silly with each other, nicely tease and even if that is just watching a funny movie.
Don’t Assume & Make Claims
You what assuming does- and there is a reason that saying is popular. It is so important to understand and find the truth from your partner. I catch myself sometimes saying words like always or never. But of course that isn’t really true and I am making a false claim.
Celebrate the Wins
We all agree that marriage is hard. So be sure to celebrate the wins and the good moments along the way. There can be amazing wins even if it is something small. Small like sticking to goals as a couple. Or big like a new baby, getting out of debt etc it doesn’t really matter.
Don’t Stop Dating
It is so important to date your spouse. We try to date each other once a week. But most of the time it ends up being once a month. Life just gets busy and things happen. But if you are looking for how to have a strong marriage then you need to be focusing on why you fell in love.
Avoid Comparison & The Grass Isn’t Always Greener
My last tip of how to have a strong marriage is to remember that the grass isn’t always greener. While we all know this saying it is something that we often forget. It can be so easy to focus on what isn’t working. While your spouse might snore and it bugs you well someone else’s might not be faithful. It is just hard to know what other people are going through. The concept that the grass isn’t always greener!
I hope these tips helped you think about how to have a strong marriage. Date your spouse, have fun and give them the benefit of the doubt.
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